In Defense of the SAHM

I have found myself defending my at-home status.

I have been at home with children since early 1996. In the early days I was a freelance production editor for a health care publisher. I was able to work around my children’s schedules quite well. I would wait for them to go down for a nap and then call authors or edit manuscripts. My work system worked until my children no longer napped. By the end of my work-at-home life, I was too tired from being with my children all day to work at night. By 2002 I was a full-time SAHM.

Here’s my secret…shhh, don’t tell. I love being at home with my kids. My son who was born after I quit my freelance job had a more relaxed early childhood. He never had to wait for me to get off the phone from a business call to play with him. If he didn’t nap, I would just let him play. When one of my daughters did not nap, I would have been stressed out about how I would complete my work assignments.

This past September my son started full-day kindergarten. With three children in full-day school I find myself wondering what to do with myself. In conversations with friends and family I find myself either dodging the question about whether I will go back to work or giving unnecessary details on my recent writing opportunities. It is as though I am trying to justify staying at home.

I have looked in to getting a job outside the home, but I would have to pay for before and after school care for two children since I live quite far away from most workplaces. My husband is not available during school hours to watch children home sick from school. I need to find a way to work from home so that I can be there for my family and contribute to my family.

I have discovered a love of writing for sites like BlogHer. So, when the next person inquires about my work status I will proudly say I am writing for mom sites and leave it at that. Who knows I may even start making some money one of these days!

3 comments for “In Defense of the SAHM

  1. jodifur
    December 1, 2008 at 9:08 pm

    you know what? I’m so sick of this debate (I’m not saying that to criticize you or your post, but the people who made you feel like you needed to write it). As women we need to support all the choices we make, stay home, work, work part time, its all ok.

  2. Mom on the Run
    December 1, 2008 at 9:33 pm

    Could not agree more. Sometimes I get a little defensive. Although there are times when I will jump in with all sorts explanations for my status when the person I am talking to didn’t really want that much detail. I guess I am a little touchy!

  3. Mommy Mo
    December 4, 2008 at 6:39 am

    I hate this question as well, as if my answer (SAHM) is less worthy than working a job that I get PAID FOR. How about when you are filling out forms or surveys and it asks what your occupation is? The answer “Homemaker” pisses me off to no end.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *