I met up with two mom friends for coffee a few weeks ago. We had planned to see each other in May, but end-of-the-school mayhem and madness put a dampener on our plans. We could not find a time when we were all free. Then summer rolled in with swim team, home building projects, summer camps, college visits, and preparing to send a teen off to college. Busy, busy, busy!
The new school year started with no let up to the mayhem. Family calendars were already full of activities, practices, and school events. I knew that if we were going to get together, we’d need to do it come what may. I sent an email and soon we had a meetup up Starbucks.
These ladies are more than acquaintances. We’re very good friends. We’ve been through the highs and lows of motherhood. I love having each of these ladies in my corner. Kind of a “go to mom friend” situation. We call each other with questions or problems. Lately we communicate more with texting and emails, which is why getting together in person is so special. We meet up at school events from time to time. Less than in the old days when we saw each other two or three times a week at one event or another. Now we see each other less often now that are children are older and schedules are busier. But like good, solid friendships we strike up conversations where we last left off. Doesn’t matter if we saw each other last week, last month, or even last year.
Our friendship works because we are flexible. We know that getting together is dependent on kids, husbands, school, work, availability of babysitting, and of course, the almighty family calendar. If the family calendar doesn’t have a slot available for coffee with my mom friends this week, hopefully I’ll find a spot next week. We roll with the punches and get together when we can.
About ten years ago, I had a monthly dinner date with these two friends and a group of others. We celebrated birthdays at local restaurants. Ate good food. Drank special drinks. Our oldest kids were still in elementary school back then. Our husbands needed only to manage dinner and homework, with perhaps a trek to soccer practice for one kid. But soon, with two or more kids in school, our evenings were anything but calm. In fact, many evenings I needed to drive one child to soccer while my husband drove another child to Girl Scouts. Dinners out with special friends sadly came to an end.
Once all my children are of driving age or in college, I know I will have a social life again. Until then, I’m the mom taxi who has the occasional coffee with friends!
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